“I don't want to step on anyone's toes” holds women back

Have you noticed that women's power in communication is often conceptualised as relating to space and territory?

"I don't want to step on anyone's toes" is a great example: it implies overreach and moving into someone else's space.

Woman are importantly often still positioned as being outside of power.

When we “break the glass ceiling” (or fall off the glass cliff or bump into a glass wall, for example,) there’s an assumption that we were in one place and had to move to another to have power; it was never inherently available to us.

Author and social commentator Elise Loehnen notes, “Women are expected to ‘know their place’—firmly outside, yet supporting circles of power—and abide by it.”

I hear the phrase "step on someone else's toes" so often, whether it's about asking for a promotion, sharing credit or asking to own a particular project.

Chances are if you're asking the question in the first place, it's an excellent indicator that you have communicative intelligence: you're already wondering how your words or your ask might affect others.

And that's great!

What you then need to decide is whether there's a way to make that ask while also being true to the thing you want.

And there likely is - you've just got to start by making the ask and taking the space accordingly.